Dear Wedding Industry,
Today is a sad day, but it has been long coming. I feel I must introduce the Kill List. A list of all things that must die. I’m sorry to have to do this to you – you’ve been such a good companion. And it saddens my heart ever so slightly, because some of these things I really like and use myself. But my heavy heart does find a glimmer of glee, because some of these things I don’t love, and I’m just sick of seeing. As I have watched you mature and grow, I have started to see a certain consistency in your ways, and I think it’s time to start changing. I say this with love and the hope we may find harmony and unite again.
The Kill List
-Themed days of the week
-Shooting for wedding blogs over the couple
-Furniture in the middle of nowhere
-Teepees (I feel I barely knew ya)
-People side-by-side holding hands with a deadpan look (I feel I knew ya too well)
-People holding every detail item they possibly could
-People holding every detail item they possibly could in close-up hand shots
-Style shoots (got a special article coming for this)
-Details being more important than people
-People holding old cameras
-Things dangling from strings on trees
-Trees (I’m sorry dear trees!)
-Tons of space over people’s heads
-Frontal feet shots where the shoes and socks aren’t really that interesting
-People being so small, their eyes are 3 pixels wide
-Tilt-shift (it was worth mentioning twice)
-People jumping in the air (when did this make a comeback? I thought it died 2 years ago?)
-Cutting images off above the mouth
-Stop motion movies
-People doing weird stuff they’d never do in real life so photographers can stuff more vintage goodies into the picture.
P.S. Add spot toning. Oh, wait. That’s long dead. Maybe we can revive it?
P.P.S Oh, and dear flare, I love you, but you’re on my watch list.