Every day is Valentine’s Day

It’s easy to hate Valentine’s Day. There nothing like forced romance to undermine the very notion of it. Couple that with the flower stand that jacked up the prices, a 1-hour stop at Godiva, and dinner with the worst menu any restaurant will serve all year, and you have the perfect recipe for misery.

But if that’s one take on Valentine’s day, then here’s another. How about the ones that mattered? Not for the obligation, but for the simple excitement of showing another person that they meant something? Maybe it was big and bold. Mabye it was small and subtle. Maybe it was a younger version of yourself that got all gussied up in the bad clothes with the bad fit, driving a borrowed car for a big first date. Or maybe it was a room filled wall-to-wall with red roses. Maybe it was down on a knee, maybe it was up in the sky, but whatever it was, there’s always some time when it was something. Where it wasn’t ridiculous. Or when the sheer audacity of it in all it’s tacky grandeur was infectious enough to be worth something. Because whether it’s over the top or under the radar, at its best, Valentine’s Day isn’t worth something for the biggest of reasons, but the smallest. Because it is a pretext to act. To do something for someone else. And if you’re excited about it, that’s enough.

Romance is a state of mind. A belief in better things and a constant movement through life together. It is seeing the world as opportunity and not obligation. When you start out in business, it is all romance. Hot, heavy, exciting, and gushy. But as the day-to-day creeps in, and the to-do lists grow, it becomes ever so much more tempting to maybe just let that little thing slip. And maybe that’s alright. But if it is, it’s the greatest peril, as well. Because it’s probably true that no one will care if you didn’t write out that card, you didn’t wrap up that DVD, or you didn’t answer the email the same hour you received it.

The problem is no one, prospect or client, will say anything. In fact, they won’t even know what changed. But they’ll feel it. They’ll feel it when you stop picking up the phone and they go straight to voicemail. When you’re not always smiling when you meet. And when you don’t write out that extra sentence in your emails to show they matter to you. And they won’t care that you were out on a shoot or in the middle of a meeting. They’ll just feel it when you fall out of love with them and what you do. And that’s a guarantee. Because it isn’t about the sum total of your actions. It is about what’s behind it, and clients can feel that. It is about the romance and the passion and seeing each thing not as an excuse to avoid action, but to commit to it. Everything is an excuse to connect deeper. Every day is Valentine’s Day. But better. Because there’s no overpriced flowers, no restaurant cashing in, and no line for chocolates. There’s just you, another person, and the relationship you build. And the one thing you sure don’t want your clients asking is “What happened to the romance?”