I always thought I wanted it pretty bad. I thought I was willing to take the hits, but when I look back and really think it through, I’d be hard pressed to make the case. It was all just plausible deniability. It was never my responsibility. Always something else. Some reason. Some excuse. Sometimes – maybe more times than not – it’s just easier to think more of yourself than to be more of yourself.
But though you can tell yourself whatever you want, life has a simple formula. You do, it gives. You don’t, it takes.
They say the bigger they are, the harder they fall, and you see it all of the time. People hit the wall – great people, often the greatest of them – who can’t crawl out of themselves any longer.
And it’s only getting harder. It’s an age of virtual navel gazing and personal brand. Hell, I’ve burnt through whole days waiting for my apps to light up. New likes? Fans? Did I go viral? It’s like an accident. You just can’t not look.
Yeah, now more than ever, you have to stand for something. Be something. And, yeah, be proud. Stand tall. Do all of it. Don’t run from your shadow, and pack your achievements in a tiny dark box in the back of your brain.
But now more than ever, you also have to let it go. Thomas Szasz said:
“Every act of conscious learning requires the willingness to suffer an injury to one’s self- esteem. That is why young children, before they are aware of their own self- importance, learn so easily; and why older persons, especially if vain or important, cannot learn at all.”
If you want to step into your future, it’s not about building, but tearing down. The walls being removed aren’t exposing you. They’re letting you go forward.
And if you’re not stepping into your future, then you’re going to have to ask the question: “Is this really what I want?” Because the hard is what makes everything great. The hard is what makes it all worth doing, and if you don’t want the hard, and you just want the fame or the fortune, maybe you don’t really want that future.
There are going to be excuses, and there are going to be obstacles. Excuses you create. Obstacles you encounter. If you come across too many excuses, odds are you really don’t want it bad enough. Look where you are, and see if it’s the path that’s the problem and not the barriers. But if the things that are stopping you are in fact obstacles, then double down and push through with everything you’ve got.
In all cases, you either hang onto the past at the expense of the future or you let go of the past and find your future. That’s the choice. Pick carefully.
“Tearing down walls does not expose you, it lets you go forward!” Love this! Thanks, Spencer! And I agree with Susannah.
Thanks Ramon! Very glad to hear that!
God give you talent so be humble. Man gives you fame so be thankful. Conceit comes from within so be careful. Passion leads to success so be patient.
Thanks for sharing, Andy!
I’m about to go through a big tearing-down, leaving my old life behind to move across the country and do something else (work on a scenic railroad). I’m a “failed photographer” but not because of the photography. I dove into the freelance life without a healthy life outside my job. The work consumed me and my personal life was destroyed. I’ll be doing photography for my new employer, and can see myself reentering the freelance world in the future. But for now, I need a break from the desperation, loneliness, and workaholism that I brought upon myself.
Incidentally, I came to this decision in November and have been busier than ever with photography work since then. But since it’s been a side job (thanks to a new part-time job that pays the bills) and everything is temporary, I’ve been able to let go of my long-term planning and stress and have found it to be an incredibly healthy experience!
That Thomas Szasz quote is perfect for what I’m doing. This winter I thought I’d figured out how I fit into the world, now I’m walking out on everything and starting from scratch. Goodbye local reputation, goodbye self-esteem from knowing who I am, goodbye comfort zone.
Goodbye, comfort zone.
Goodbye, comfort zone.
Fuck you, comfort zone.
Amazing! That’s great – so happy to hear that you’re making bold decisions, Tyler, and I’m looking forward to hearing what things come your way.
“Fuck you, comfort zone.” I love it! The hard part is keeping the “F’ing mantra” going as you brave new worlds, and I am discovering the more I do it the less I need it – it’s becoming a way of life.
The worst excuse of them all is “Good enough”.
If you don’t use it, sky’s the limit.
If you do, your skies are made of styrofoam.
Absolutely.
This could not have come at a better time. The future is for those brave enough to take it.
A simply perfect post for where I find myself at the moment…
Very interesting,thank you
Best advice I heard all year!
service